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Faith in Sobriety
January 10, 2023 Dear God, good morning. The topic I need to require is having faith in you, Lord Jesus. I begged you for help back in two-thousand-fourteen. I still drank alcohol and learned that my dog Annie-girl had four-stage cancer. The veterinarian told me the terrible news. And I had to put Annie girl down, which was the hardest thing I had ever done. I only had Annie for eight years. It broke my heart. I believe that Annie girl is on the rainbow bridge with other doggies. You gave me faith in Jesus. When I had a lovely dream of Annie’s girl. I remember waking up at six…
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Jesus is Your Deliverer
December 8, 2022 Dear God, Good morning. Today’s reading from God’s Promises for every day says Jesus is your deliverer.” I truly believe you delivered me from the hell of alcoholism and from trying to kill myself with pills and alcohol, and from being killed by my former abuser Josh. Two-thousand and eleven was the worst year I encountered. My boyfriend, Josh, physically attacked me at four in the morning. Josh’s head-butted my head, and I felt pain so severe I blacked out. I woke up to Josh strangling me with his left arm. I was choking and starving for air. I turned towards his left bicep, which was choking…
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Abuse and Alcoholism
December 6, 2022 Dear God, Good morning. Today’s reading from God’s Promises for every day says Jesus is your deliverer.” I truly believe you delivered me from the hell of alcoholism and from trying to kill myself with pills and alcohol, and from being killed by my former abuser Josh. Two-thousand and eleven was the worst year I encountered. My boyfriend, Josh, physically attacked me at four in the morning. Josh’s head-butted my head, and I felt pain so severe I blacked out. I woke up to Josh strangling me with his left arm. I was choking and starving for air. I turned towards his left bicep, which was choking…
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Grace of God in Recovery
November 12, 2022 Dear God, good morning. Today’s reading is about “The Grace of God.” And if we follow your teachings and do not sin anymore. The Bible writes, You gave me life and showed me kindness, and in your care, you watched over my life.” Job 10-12 When I do look back, I can now see that you were with me in my darkest days while I was drinking. I was a falling down piss my pants, blackout alcoholic. I still kept drinking my sorrows away. I thought I was too young for this fellowship when I was twenty. Until I saw a lot of young people in the…
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God’s Promises
October 22. 2022 Dear God, good morning. It’s early four a.m. And I’m a little tired. In my little brown book, God’s Promises for every day, I write, “What to do when you are unhappy? I was disappointed with myself for drinking again in twenty- twelve. I thought I could be a social drinker even after years of sobriety, and I was a sick cookie. I wanted to drink alcohol like a social drinker. In my case, I tried to drink normally. I tried, and I could not stop the compulsive drinking, it consumed me every day. I was unhappy because I was searching for that happy good lucky feeling,…
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Depression Versus God
September 10, 2022 Good Morning, Dear God. Today I don’t even want to write to you. My stupid depression has gotten worst. I need to call my psychiatrist Monday morning. I wrote you a long letter this morning and lost it on my computer. I trust in you, Jesus, to lift the agony of this depression today. You always come to my rescue, and thank you. My little Bible says, “What to do when you feel depressed?” God, I know you hear my cry for help. I feel empty on the inside of my soul. My heart feels broken. I feel despondent and lack faith today. I need your Spirit…
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Alcoholic and Alcoholism
September 8, 2022 Dear God, good morning. Yesterday I did not want to deal with the world, and all I did was rest, and I fell asleep early. On Tina’s hour, we spoke about the 24-hour book, The Thought for the day writes, “But for the grace of God, there go I.” When I see active alcoholics drinking, walking down the street with a paper bag. And the one who is waiting at the liquor store to open. I never look down on an alcoholic or drug addict. I don’t like that statement. “But for the Grace of God, there go I.” Yes, the active alcoholics and drug addicts…
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Relapse in Detail
September 2, 2022 Dear God, good morning. Yesterday, I was writing about the last time I was out drinking. I wanted to be a “Social Drinker,” and I meant it! I wanted my cake and eat it too, and I wanted to drink alcohol without any consequences or problems. I was heading toward relapse! When bartending at the Disabled American Veterans (DAV), Many bikers were now coming down to the DAV, it was a clubhouse for them. They would do the ice bucket challenge outside to the new prospects. Watching some tough biker guys scared of the ice bucket challenge was hilarious. I got to know a few guys personally,…
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Relapse and Rationalizing
September 1, 2022 I volunteered as a barmaid at the Disabled American Veteran’s club (DAV). I was Sobha for a year. I was okay with bartending. I passed the test with flying colors. I received my certificate to bartend. I didn’t even have a desire to drink alcohol. The people came down to the DAV in Malden, Massachusetts. The drinks were cheap. A Capitan and coke only cost three dollars. People from all walks of life came to the bar. They played darts and pool, and on different nights the veterans would play whist, and on Thursday nights, it was Texas Hold’em. And I would play cards with them.…
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Depression in Recovery
August 31, 2022 Good morning, dear God. I hope that you can heal the depression I get in the afternoons. Yes, the depression is rearing its ugly head again. I can’t stand it, and it hurts my heart. People who don’t get mental illness are so lucky. Depression feels like a dark cloud lingering over my head. I don’t want to be around people, so I retire to my bedroom, where I can sleep the pain away. It puzzles me that I have to go through this again. Please help me to help myself. Maybe Gary and I can watch a movie this afternoon to keep me from…
