First Meeting
0
0
May 20, 2022
Good morning, God. It’s a foggy and rainy morning. I never knew love until I went to my first meeting back in nineteen-eighty-seven. When I went to the fellowship and saw people in the meeting hugging one another, I was surprised that these people appeared happy and sohba. I was only twenty-one years old. I didn’t know if I was an alcoholic. My caseworker Christena suggested that I attend a meeting. It was a summer day in Boston, and I walked into the meeting hall. There was an older man on the ground passed out from drinking. He was in the doorway, and I had no choice but to step over him as everyone else did. I felt terrible for the poor guy.
I went into the hall and sat down right away. I said nothing to anyone, and no one came near me, and I was okay with that. The meeting chair sounded like a professional speaker, and I didn’t hear him. I was more concerned about getting out of the meeting, but Christena said she’d meet me there, so I had to stay to meet up with her for a whole meeting.
So, the speaker finished talking, and they went around the room to identify with their names and say that they were alcoholics and drug addicts. As they were going around the room, identifying, I kept looking at the door for Christena every five minutes. Then, a guy said, “Hi, my name is John, and I’m an alcoholic, and I’m gay. Well, I thought, why is he so fuckin happy to be an alcoholic? Then a woman said Hi, my name is Jean, and I’m an alcoholic and bisexual. I wanted to run out of the meeting, but I thought something was wrong with me. “Sexually”?
When it was my turn to identify, I said, “I’m Geri, and I don’t know what the fuck I am.” I was serious, and the whole room started laughing. Nothing made sense to me then. I was in a gay and lesbian meeting, and I didn’t know.
My second meeting was a gay men’s meeting, and they let me stay. Then I felt uncomfortable and left at break time.
My third meeting was in Malden at Club 24. Women and men talked, laughed, and set up the chairs and ashtrays. People looked very happy. That was the meeting where I met my first love, Burt. He looked handsome and rough. I liked guys like that. But when he spoke, he spoke softly and was kind. So, we became friends right away before we became lovers months later. We were best friends. We never argued. We always talked to each other with respect and kindness. Whatever I wanted, Burt always made sure I was happy.
Burt picked up a drink after seven years of being Sobha. I went into a depression, which is why he drank. I stayed sohba and went off to Wheelock College. My heart broke when Burt drank. He was my first love. I needed to write out my experience of coming into the fellowship. I have love in my heart for my friends in the fellowship. Through the fellowship, I found true harmony, kindness, understanding, and unconditional love. Thank you, sweet Jesus, for the fellowship it saved my life. I’m genuinely grateful to you and love you. Love me
