September 13, 2022

Dear God, good morning. Today’s reading is about rejoicing in the Lord, and I am always happy and grateful for you, Jesus. I rejoice morning. I am always looking forward to writing to you, and I receive joy when I do to you write. God, there has been a special bond we have together since last year. I can’t explain it, but getting to know you, Jesus is a wonderful feeling.

You came to me when I cried out for you and held me until I stopped weeping. I felt the warmth of your arms around me. I did not know what was happening to me. Only that the sadness disappeared that morning. And I felt gratefulness in my soul, and my heart was singing with joy. I felt the presence of you in my bedroom while I was praying to you for help.

You gave me hope last year when I was desperate for help. The anguish in my soul was so painful. Maybe it was my depression. You are my father, and I love you. The Bible writes, “The everlasting God is your place of safety, and his arms will hold you up forever.” Deuteronomy 33-27 I truly believe you lifted me out of despair and brought me closer to you.

Today’s reading in my book, God’s Promises for every day, write, “What to do when you feel lonely?” I was always a loner throughout my life. I made friends only to lose them because DSS kept putting me into different foster homes or group homes for girls. I would live far from my friends and lose contact with them.

I was a shy kid, always alone. I felt sad in elementary school. I no longer knew where my siblings were living. My world collapsed when I was taken away from my sisters and brother. I was only nine years old. I began to shut down from the world. I was suffering in silence. No one knew how distraught I was when I left my siblings behind. I went from living in Hull, Massachusetts, to Tewksbury, Massachusetts, an hour and a half away from my sisters and brother. I remember being so sad as a child because I was so alone. Friends came and left. I was young. I maybe made friends here or there, only to lose them indefinitely because I was in too many foster homes. The Bible writes, “If my father and mother leave me, the Lord will take me in.” Psalm 27:10

I believe today that you have been protecting me my whole life. After my biological parents did give me up for adoption, it writes, “The mountains may disappear, and the hills may come to an end, but my love will never disappear; my promise of peace will not come to an end,” says the Lord who shows mercy to you.” Isaiah 54:10

Knowing that your love will never disappear is comforting to me. I know today you have always loved me. I feel peace in my heart when writing to you, Jesus. In two-thousand and sixteen, I wrote to you,

“Please, Dear Jesus, help me heal and forgive my sins, love your daughter Geraldine. I do love you, dear Lord.”

I wrote that tiny note to you because I had some faith in you, Jesus, that you would give me the strength to get sohba again. I’m so grateful that you got me sohba again. And I will always appreciate you, dear Jesus, for saving me from drinking myself to death. And for the suicide attempts too. Since I got sohba, life has been beautiful. I have hard days, but I always stay grateful for all you have done for me and more. I love you!