Godletters
Adversity,  Fear

Sad Memories to Remember

Views: 589
0 0
Read Time:3 Minute, 5 Second

 

      May 15, 2022                                      4:37 a.m.

Dear God, good morning. Yesterday was a difficult day. Memories of my mother began to haunt me. I felt so depressed I couldn’t see Fernando, and I took a shower which helped my emotions. Just standing in the shower washed away my mother’s intrusive memories of her abusing me. It still hurts my heart today. Today’s reading from God’s Promises for every day writes that when you’re feeling depressed, go to God.

“I will give them a crown to replace their ashes, and the oil of gladness to replace their sorrow, and clothes of praise to replace their spirit of sadness. Then they will be called Trees of Goodness, trees planted by the Lord to show his greatness.” Isaiah 61:3 I feel you in my heart Lord, and I believe in you completely. My sorrows did go away. Thank you, sweet Jesus. I run to you, God, please take away any sadness that still lingers in my heart.

I feel good this morning. I get to see Fernando, and we’ll talk about getting a two-family house. I miss Fernando; we need to be together. If we do get a two-family house, it would be perfect. I need to contact Lamaic real estate. They are great, and I’ve seen them on television. Real professionals, I’ll call them on Monday.

In God’s Promises for every day, it states: “He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds… So don’t worry, because I am with you. Don’t be afraid because I am your God. I will make you strong and will help you. I will support with my right hand that saves you.” Isaiah 41:10

Jesus, you have saved me so many times from harm. Throughout my life, I could not see that you were protecting me. Now I see with clear eyes that you were always there for me. During the midst of my alcoholism, you were there for me when I fell sick. You got me sohba again, thank you. I don’t recommend detoxing at home. I needed to go to the hospital, I was physically sick, but I stayed in bed. I literally could not move. My sister, Sunflower, took care of me. She fed me and got me in the shower. I love my sister. She nursed me back to health. She’s my angel.

I felt ashamed and guilty for relapsing again. I have been around the Fellowship for thirty-five years, yet I picked up a drink again after being completely sohba for many years. I stopped counting the years ago. The shame and guilt consumed me. I was a falling-down drunk that nobody wanted around. Either I was coming home late and drunk or sitting on the picnic tables at any veteran’s clubs or other bars and trying to sohba up, but I was not sohba, and I would drive home intoxicated.

I was drinking alcohol almost destroyed my marriage. My husband was talking about divorcing me. He had enough of my lies, my drinking, hiding the alcohol in the house, changes in my behaviors, and going out. He couldn’t trust me, and I put him through hell. Why would he trust me? I was out all the time drinking with the girls. I’m grateful to you, sweet Jesus, for my husband. He’s put up with my drinking for five years.

I know Fernando loves me entirely and understands my alcoholism, Bio-Polar episodes, and depression. Thank you, Jesus, for putting Fernando in my life. I love him dearly. Love me

 

Facebook
Hosting Company
return home

Happy
Happy
0 %
Sad
Sad
0 %
Excited
Excited
0 %
Sleepy
Sleepy
0 %
Angry
Angry
0 %
Surprise
Surprise
0 %
Verified by MonsterInsights